Phoenix

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There was a time, about a decade or so ago that I used to look longingly to the birds and in envy wish that I had huge, glorious, soft wings. With these wings I would fly away from my life, from it’s difficulties and it’s sufferings.

But this morning during my meditative walk, I noticed the birds soaring through the blue sky and I recalled this time in my life of great suffering and tears flooded my eyes. It wasn’t sorrow that I felt, it was a deep and profound sense of compassion for the person that I was and for the experiences that I endured. And I also felt grateful that my wish did not come true, that I did not grow wings and fly away because what I know is that there is no reprieve in escape.

It is not with wings that we overcome, it is with our legs and our feet, shaking, trembling and steadily moving us forward, one step at a time, with courage and often a blind faith that we will heal.

And now a decade later, I am overcome with reverence for that scared, young girl who with the support and love of a few strong women walked through fire and like the phoenix, she rose from the ashes of her devastation and became the powerful women she is today.

I am that powerful women and now I see that I always was.

Ann TeppermanComment